Mindful Exercise for Negative Talk and Anxiety: "Befriending the Inner Critic"

Goal: To help the client observe, understand, and compassionately relate to negative self-talk and anxiety, reducing their overwhelming impact and fostering internal harmony.

Preparation: Find a comfortable, quiet space where you won't be disturbed for 10-15 minutes. You may sit or lie down.

The Exercise:

(1. Somatic Awareness & Grounding - Drawing from Somatic Awareness & Somatic Experiencing):

• "Let's begin by bringing gentle awareness to your body. Close your eyes if you feel comfortable, or soften your gaze. Notice the contact points of your body with the chair or floor. Feel your feet on the ground, sensing their connection. Take a few slow, deep breaths, noticing the rise and fall of your abdomen. Allow your breath to be natural, without trying to change it. Just observe. What sensations do you notice in your body right now? Perhaps a feeling of warmth, coolness, tingling, or pressure. There's no right or wrong, just noticing."

• "If you notice any tension, imagine your breath creating a little more space around that sensation, without needing to release it. Just being present with it."

(2. Invitation to the Inner Experience - Drawing from Internal Family Systems (IFS) & Somatic IFS):

• "Now, as you continue to breathe, I invite you to notice any negative thoughts or anxious feelings that might be present. Instead of trying to push them away, imagine you are inviting them to be seen. If you were to give this negative talk or anxiety a form, what might it look like? How does it feel in your body? Does it have a color, a texture, a location?"

• "Without judgment, just observe it. Is there a particular thought or phrase that keeps repeating? 'I'm not good enough,' 'I'm going to fail,' or a sense of dread?"

• "Now, see if you can gently ask this part of you that holds the negative talk or anxiety: 'What are you trying to tell me?' or 'What are you trying to protect me from?' Just listen for any response, no matter how subtle. It might be a feeling, an image, or a word."

(3. Self-Energy & Compassionate Connection - Drawing from Internal Family Systems (IFS) & Somatic IFS):

• "As you listen, notice if you can access a sense of curiosity, calm, clarity, compassion, courage, creativity, connectedness, or confidence within yourself. This is your 'Self-energy.' See if you can bring this 'Self' quality forward."

• "From this place of Self, with genuine curiosity and compassion, turn towards the part that is holding the negative talk or anxiety. Imagine offering it your gentle presence, as if you were sitting with a frightened child or a worried friend. You don't need to fix it, just be with it."

• "Perhaps you can say to this part, silently or aloud: 'I see you. I hear you. I understand you're trying to help (or protect) me, even if your methods are causing distress right now.'"

(4. Cognitive Reframing & Behavioral Awareness - Drawing from CBT & ACT):

• "From this compassionate perspective, let's gently explore the content of the negative thoughts. Are these thoughts 100% true? What evidence do you have for them? What evidence might contradict them? (Briefly and gently, without getting stuck in debate)."

• "Now, consider the behavior associated with these thoughts and feelings. When these thoughts arise, what do you tend to do? Do you withdraw? Ruminate? Try to control? And what are the consequences of those behaviors?"

• "If you were to act in alignment with your values, even with these thoughts present, what might be a small, values-consistent action you could take? (e.g., 'Even though I feel anxious, I value connection, so I will reach out to a friend.')"

(5. Acceptance and Mindful Defusion - Drawing from ACT & DBT):

• "Now, let's practice acceptance. Instead of fighting these thoughts or feelings, can you make space for them? Imagine them like clouds passing in the sky. You don't need to grab onto them, nor do you need to push them away. Just let them be there."

• "Practice 'noting' the thoughts: 'I am noticing a thought about being inadequate,' or 'I am noticing a sensation of anxiety in my chest.' This helps to create a little distance, reminding you that you are the observer, not the thought or feeling itself."

• "From a DBT perspective, engage in a 'Wise Mind' moment. What does your rational mind tell you about the situation? What does your emotional mind tell you? Can you find a balance, a wisdom that integrates both?"

(6. Regulation and Re-orientation - Drawing from Somatic Experiencing & Trauma Resiliency Model):

• "As we come to the close of this exercise, gently bring your attention back to your body. Notice your breathing. Scan for any shifts in sensation. Even if the anxiety or negative talk is still present, notice if there's any small shift in its intensity, or perhaps a new sensation of calm or grounding somewhere in your body."

• "If you notice any pleasant or neutral sensations, allow your attention to linger there for a moment. This is 'pendulation' – moving between challenging and resourcing sensations. Allow your nervous system to gently self-regulate."

• "Gently stretch your fingers and toes. When you're ready, slowly open your eyes, bringing your awareness back to the room around you. Notice 3 things you can see, 2 things you can hear, and 1 thing you can feel."

Debrief and Integration (Post-Exercise):

• "What did you notice during this exercise? Were there any surprises?"

• "Did any new understanding emerge about the negative talk or anxiety?"

• "How did it feel to approach these internal experiences with curiosity and compassion?"

• "What small, values-consistent action could you commit to taking today or this week, even if these thoughts or feelings are still present?"

• "Remember, this is a practice. The more you engage with your internal world in this way, the more you cultivate inner harmony and resilience."